Shattered Pieces

I wish I was able to comfort you at this time of grief. At the moment I don’t know what it is to experience a close relative in their deathbed. What hurts the most is the prophecies given to your mother about being reunited with her children. Then there’s figuring out who’s to blame. Is it because we didn’t separate that all of this came about? Was I trying to be with you against your will, being that you were aware of the prophecies and wanted to avoid death? I just don’t know what to think anymore. My heart goes out to you. Sometimes I wonder what if we really did fast for real? What difference would it have made? What if we did separate and you didn’t become pregnant? There’s just too many questions and not enough answers. I would have loved to console you right now. To let you know that God still loves you. But during this whole experience our relationship was damaged even more than ever. This this happens to add more insult to injury. If only things were different. Everything is ruined and the only one I can speak to is God….

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3 thoughts on “Shattered Pieces

  1. kypmommy

    TYou can still console her. It might cause you a twinge of discomfort and uncertainty inside. She might be angry. Confused. Then angry again. And of course the grief. Grief does funny things. But such is the dynamic of the relationship between a man and woman. It would be okay to say, “I know what it seems like right now, but I truly don’t want you to hurt.” And whether she shows it in that moment, or not…it will touch her heart. Because that is where you’ve been.

    Reply
      1. kypmommy

        It’s never that simple. I speak from a whole lot of experience. There’s just a whole lot of grief. Grief over a loss of family. Grief over loss of a relationship. Grief over loss of an ideal. Uncertainty. Barrage of hormones. I’m sorry it sucks so bad.

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