I am not a big fan of Calvinism, but sometimes I feel as though I have no choice but to believe in God. There’s a quote from Justo Gonzalez that states,
“Belief is not something we can force ourselves to do. Rather, it is something we find ourselves doing.”(Heretics for Armchair Theologians p.g. 120).
I always find myself believing when the circumstances begs otherwise. Or perhaps it really is my choice. I decided to read the scriptures, I decided to take these words seriously, so that when push comes to shove all I can conclude is that God knows best and I know nothing. If God really did choose me, then why is it that I feel as though I am constantly failing at life? I end up filling a person up with false hope? Or perhaps I misunderstood salvation, perhaps God is not in the business of redeeming the natural. Either I believe God is wrong, or I believe in the wrong God. There may be liberation in Christ, but that does not give me the freedom to imagine God to be whatever I want Him to be. This is what Got us into chains in the first place.